Mayo Crisis

 

It was time to make mayo.  I think I put three cups of oil in a quart jar.  But that filled it up.  There really should have been room for a fourth cup.  I put the oil in a one quart measuring container and it did have enough room for another cup.  So something seemed off kilter.  I should have stopped immediately.  

Sadly, I have been watching videos about mayo again.  One of them strongly recommended whisking the eggs and putting them in the microwave for around 45 seconds to pasteurize them.  I don't worry much about egg germs, since it's unlikely for an egg to get germs due to the shell.  Nevertheless, the video person urged that one pasteurize the eggs because then the mayo would last for around a month instead of a week.  Well, yeah.  The mayo is never around for more than a few days though.  

OK.  I decided, "How hard is it to put eggs into the microwave?"  This must have been Satan speaking.  I put them in for 30 seconds to err on the side of caution.  Then I had scrambled eggs.  Back to the drawing board.  Incredibly, I tried again, for the final time I ever try this hopefully.   I thought stirring it every few seconds would fix it.  Then I thought I would strain it to try and retrieve the raw part.  No egg went through the strainer.  

By now a five minute chore had taken half an hour.   I was rewarded with a mayo fail. 

Having also watched several videos on mayo rescue, I decided to attempt to fix it.  At least eight eggs and two egg yolks later, plus three tablespoons of collagen powder I had some glop that looked like eggnog.  

Some have said, when their mayo fails like this, "I use it for hollandaise sauce!"  Have I ever made hollandaise sauce?  No.  I have also never eaten hollandaise sauce.  "Oh, but you could use this glop as a salad dressing!" some have said.  Then I'm pretty sure your nice salad that you put so much effort into would also be ruined.   

So after 45 minutes I put my mayo fail in the refrigerator and hoped the collagen would make it gel enough to use.