Don't Eat Soy!

I read a home medical advice book once about remedies for gout.  "Whatever you do, don't eat celery!" it said.  I read another book, only a few minutes later on gout.  "Eat celery!" it urged.  

How many foods have I been advised to avoid?  All foods in the nightshade family.  All dairy foods.  Celery.  Any disaccharide or polysaccharide.  Meat. Fish. Poultry. Certainly no hot dogs or bacon. Soy? No! Any other bean?  No! Coconut?  Probably not.  Wheat? No. Corn? No. Rice? No.  And no rye or barley either.  

I went to the grocery once thinking, "I'm going to get wholesome, nutritious food."  I stood in the produce section, feeling confused for a couple of minutes, and wondered which way to go.  Eggs? No. Cheese? Absolutely not. Bread?  Tuna has mercury and radiation. Haven't I heard anything?? This was not to mention processed food.  Ice cream. Pizza. Cookies. I couldn't figure out which way to run.  There was absolutely nothing left.  I needed groceries, but on that day I actually left the store without any.  

I sat at home later without any dinner, and thought about what I must do.  There was no alternative but to eat some of the things I had been warned not to eat, since there wasn't a single food I hadn't been warned not to eat.  Cheese has mold.  Mold might aggravate candida.  To say nothing of being dairy.  Nuts? Also moldy. Was I insane?  Gluten? Am I joking?   Sugar? That would be suicide.  

I have a theory about food.  All food is somewhat poisonous, yet we have to eat or we'll die sooner than we would by eating poisonous food.  Why? Because this is God's trump card.  It's a method of control.  I stopped eating once for a long time.  It was so long that God seemed to be concerned.  I noticed that I was being given things I prayed for.  Would I eat? Well, I didn't know.  Maybe I would starve.  I laughed a little thinking I had finally figured out how to twist God's arm.  

Go to the doctor sometime and listen to what they think about your health.  It's deplorable, they'll say.  You've been eating!  The last time I went to the doctor it was about my ankle.  Soon I was getting a stern lecture on how I needed to stop eating.  Sadly I ignored him.   Then I had only myself to blame for a sprained ankle.  

I still haven't found my way through this maze.  I usually avoid sugar and grain.  That's all I'm up to.